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This is Episode 36 of Dice, Camera, Action.

Summary[ | ]

Episode 36: Small Packages[ | ]

The Party[ | ]

(Anna) Evelyn - Human Paladin of Lathander

(Holly) Strix - Tiefling Sorcerer

(ProJared) Diath - Human Rogue

(Nathan) Paultin - Human Bard

The Silver Marches[ | ]

The heroes are in the Silver Marches. They just survived a hill giant attack and they are quite wounded. Evelyn had gotten separated from the group last session. Anna says it was because she got carried away catching snowflakes on her tongue.

Evelyn finds the group and uses healing magic on Diath and Paultin. She checks on Zog, the dwarf.. He's not breathing. Zog has a diamond that Diath can uses a spell component to bring him back to life. Once Diath use the resurrection power, he can not use it again.

Evelyn prays to Lathander to apologize on behalf of her allies. Her friends let Zog die and she wants Lathander to help them be the party that he wants them to be.

The group looks through Zog’s stuff:

  •     Diamond worth 10,000 gp
  •     Abacus
  •     Ball bearings
  •     Cow bell
  •     Empty bottles
  •     Caltrops
  •     Climbers kit
  •     Crowbar
  •     Hammer
  •     Pitons
  •     Copper jug
  •     Lantern with no oil
  •     Lock with no key
  •     Manacles
  •     Mess kit
  •     Whetstone

They also find a map with dwarven scrawling on it. Nobody in the group can read dwarven.

Evelyn says that she wants to give the diamond to an heir of Zog, or maybe donate it to the poor. The group is appalled.

Strix puts the cowbell on Hootie, who begins to eat a giant’s corpse. Hootie is still wounded. Evelyn lays on hands and heals Hootie, who Chris says is female, for 10 points.

Resurrecting Zog[ | ]

Diath is going to use the diamond to resurrect Zog. He makes this decision very quickly.

Diath is thrown into a trance. His eyes turn black, his skin turns pale. Energy flows through him, and after an hour, Zog is back among the living. Diath’s power is now gone.

The group rests. It turns out that Hootie and Mourning Glory can fit in the waffle hut.

Revenge of the Giants[ | ]

The group travels for a bit and come upon a wounded hill giant. It’s Fo, one of the giants that the group fought last session. He has a rock, ready to heave it at the group. The female is nearby.

Fo is made to drop the rock on his foot, and he calls out: “Fo unhappy!”

The female shouts, "Bring me food!"

The battle begins and the female flops onto Zog.

The male giant is slain. Paultin thunderwaves the female off of Zog using a 3rd level slot, rolling her off of him 10 feet. Zog is alive! Then she does a flying butt drop on Zog. Horrible scrunching sound. Zog is dead again.

Strix and Paultin are next to each other, casting spells. Paultin casts suggestion on the female hill giant, and points out that if she's hungry she can eat snow. She loves this idea and starts to do so.

Strix sees that she is buying it, but Strix tells Paultin that she really wants to destroy her with a fireball. Murderbot takes exception to this and immediately fires a dart into Strix's neck, doing two points of damage and knocking her unconscious. As she drops, Strix calls out to her owlbear: "Avenge me!"

Hootie the owlbear is confused and ambles over. Hootie looks at Murderbot. Murderbot tries to shift the blame to Paultin. Hootie nudges Strix with her beak.

Evelyn runs over and tries to lay on hands to heal Strix. It does heal damage, but it doesn't make Strix conscious.

Simon[ | ]

Paultin chastises his "son" Murderbot, who Paultin has re-named Simon. Paultin encourages him to channel that energy against the giants. Murderbot shoots a dart into the female giant, which breaks the suggestion spell.

Evelyn immediately starts referring to Simon as if he is her son and Paultin is the father. She flies over and does a lot of damage to the female giant. Paultin casts dissonant whispers, which does psychic damage and kills the giant.

Evelyn says, "That's what I call a brain freeze."

With the battle over, Evelyn says that they might need to put their son into some kind of after school program

Diath is not happy at all with Murderbot. He questions the evil little thing and makes an insight check. He rolls a natural 20, so he knows that Murderbot went out of his way to use a sleep dart rather than a more deadly dart. Diath also sees that Murderbot is hiding something.

Diath picks up the still-unconscious Strix and puts her on Hootie.

Murderbot tries to settle things with a handshake, but Diath refuses.

Zog's Fate[ | ]

They check on Zog. He's dead! Once again, Diath went to great lengths to help a dead ally and it didn't work out at all. The group is dying of laughter and Anna asks Jared, "How much do you think Chris Perkins hates you?"

The waffle crew decides to loot Zog. Strix comes to and digs out the heart of the female giant. Strix is covered in blood. The heart is the size of a soccer ball. She decides to cut out some fat to use for candles. While Paultin admires Strix for being so 'metal', the sight of this make Evelyn vomit violently.

Strix threatens Murderbot. Somebody points out that Diath is basically the dad of the entire party.

The group buries Zog. He's flat, so it doesn't take long to dig a hole. Zog's mission was to deliver a message to Citadel Adbar. The group doesn't know what the message is. They decide to head there anyway, at least to let the dwarves know what happened to Zog.

Hunger[ | ]

The Waffle Crew travel for 3 days and they are running low on food. They make camp in the magical waffle hut. They estimate that they are still one week away from the mountains.

Paultin wants to eat Hootie. The group notices that Hootie is not doing well. Hootie is pregnant and about to give birth!

Evelyn tries to deliver the baby. Her animal handling check: total of 3. Strix assists, giving Evelyn advantage. Evelyn rolls again and gets a total of 10.

Hootie dies giving birth, but the baby lives. Chris points out that for all they know, owlbears always die when giving birth. The baby is gooey and squeaky.

The group proceeds to eat and make jerky out of Hootie while they think of a name for her daughter. Strix calls it Baboo, but that's not the name. The baby owlbear's name: Waffles. End of session.

The heroes hit 8th level.